![]() ![]() The two thousand hours are spread out over four years you spend the rest of the time sleeping and trying to get dates. Trust me: these are closely related to college.) College is basically a bunch of rooms where you sit for roughly two thousand hours and try to memorize things. The only things you young persons think seriously about are loud music and sex. I have managed to forget one of them, but I still remember that the other two were more.Ĭollege by Dave Barry Many of you young persons out there are seriously thinking about going to college. For example, when I was in college, I had to memorize - don't ask me why - the names of three metaphysical poets other than John Donne. It's very difficult to forget everything. If you fail to forget them, you become a professor and have to stay in college for the rest of your life. The idea is, you memorize these things, then write them down in little exam books, then forget them. These are the things you learn in classes whose names end in -ology, -osophy, -istry, -ics, and so on. Things you will not need to know in later life (1,998 hours). ![]() Things you will need to know in later life (two hours). Basically, you learn two kinds of things in college: 1. College is basically a bunch of rooms where you sit for roughly two thousand hours and try to memorize things. ![]()
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